Monday, May 14, 2007
Forgive for YOU
When someone said to me that I should forgive everyone who has ever hurt me - I told them that they are nuts! I was told that you don't forgive for others, you forgive for yourself.It took me a long time to get a better understanding of this. I always thought that forgiveness meant that what they did was okay and that I was wrong to feel the way I did about what they did. I then heard someone else say that was not the case - you need to be clear that you still believe that what they did was wrong, but you will no longer be consumed by those actions. Forgiveness is when you can think about the trauma without being hurt, angry or upset or feel hatred towards the person who induced the hurt. I also know that you can only forgive when you are ready... It took me 10 years. I don't want it to take you 10 years because it caused me a lot of anguish. During times when I should've been happy - I couldn't be. I over-reacted about small things. I was not able to live life to the full. You need to do a spring-cleaning of your heart, clear the blockages and realise that you are really a great person with lots to give, else you would not have been targetted by an insecure, envious bully. Forgive as soon as you can - it's really the most amazing feeling to feel secure, fulfilled, loving and kind. Please contact me so that I can give you advice on coping with your unique situation. My website again - www.adigc.com
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2 comments:
I know what is liked to be bullied by people. While growing up, I was bullied by my mother and classmates. I did not discuss what I was going through with anyone. So I acted like anyone else who were in my shoes, by isolating myself from people. I would sit in my bedroom with evil thoughts going through my mind, plotting on how I was going to seek revenge on the people who wronged me. This went on for years. The bullying did not stop when I became an adult. My ex boyfriend not only bullied me but physically abused me as well. I was bullied at my job as well. I never stood up for myself or stood my ground. Instead, I just bottled everything up to the point where I had a nervous breakdown and contemplated suicide. By not forgiving the offenders who offended me, I harvested so much hatred in my heart. I decided to seek help not just for me but for my three children. They deserve to have a happy, emotionally healthy mother, not a bitter victim. Everyday is a struggle and I take it one day at a time. You cannot go back in the past and change it; It is too late. You have to leave the past in the past and move forward in life.
Anonymous that was beautiful. I am bullied too,and I want to forgive.
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